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Truth is Beauty 

I Hate My Natural Hair Color!

3/18/2019

37 Comments

 
...says reader D.C.

She seeks help determining her season, and also wonders whether she should make her hair darker or lighter.

When a woman tells me she hates her natural color, I immediately suspect she's a muted season  -  i.e., a Summer or an Autumn.  Those are the seasons whose colors are in-between, hard to describe, often nameless. We think with language; I believe we dislike in-between colors in ourselves because we don't have the language to conceptualize them.

Here's the thing: If you think your hair is "blah," chances are the rest of your coloring is similarly subtle and blended. Putting Crayola-colored hair next to your blended skin will only make you disappear.

​
Picture
Interesting, perhaps. Unusual. Thought-provoking, maybe? But not beautiful.
Keep your hair as muted as your skin, and surround the whole vision with similarly quiet colors, and watch everything suddenly come into focus.
Picture
THIS is beautiful.
Your natural hair color flatters you more than any other color can, and its subtle beauty is always revealed when it's placed in the context of your best colors. 

Compare Lady Gaga in unnatural hair colors, on the left, to Lady Gaga in something more like her natural hair color on the right. 

Picture
Picture
Picture
Picture
Picture
Which of these ^ women looks the most healthy? Which looks the most comfortable in her skin? Which looks the most confident? Which woman isn't afraid to be real with you?


Unnatural hair color is a look, for sure.  It makes a statement. But it may not be the statement you want to make.

Natural hair color says, "See ME. This is who I am. I know myself and I like myself. I am not afraid and I don't want to hide from you."

​That kind of power and presence isn't blah; it's beautiful. 




Original version published September 2015.
37 Comments
Charity
3/18/2019 03:49:32 pm

I have always hated my hair color. I was a lovely light blonde as a child and then it darkened into a mousy grayish-brown. I've had it red, blonde, brunette (I usually look best as a brunette), etc., and looking back at photos -- yes, you do have a point. Go as natural as possible to your own hair color.

I'd say if you can't stand it, pick a shade close to your own and maybe go one darker. The best darker hues on me had an ashy-brown base, one or two shades darker and it made my eyes pop.

Reply
Miranda
3/18/2019 04:10:03 pm

I'm a Soft Summer with ashy brown hair (though it's gotten a lot of red in it the past few years). I've done many different colors over the years, most often deep henna red, TARDIS blue, or dark purple. I actually realized that I was wrong about my color season because I thought my hair had gotten dark and dull as an adult, and figured out that it was iron build-up. After a few clarifying treatments, my eyes (which I thought had faded with age) were suddenly deep blue again. I am *really* careful not to do anything to change the color of my hair now.

Reply
Ing-Marie Koppel
3/18/2019 10:17:03 pm

Just found this in the Swedish paper Expressen. A Swedish couple had to pay 2376 crowns (257 us dollars) for miscolorings around the draining gutter in their bathroom. They were moving out of their flat and the purple/lilac stains on their bathroom floor was impossible to take away. The reason of the purple/lilac miscolorings were the dye she had used to color her hair.

Reply
Miranda
3/19/2019 03:11:14 am

I sympathize. I once dyed a shower purple.

Lena
3/19/2019 02:02:03 pm

To be honest, I'm not sure what having to pay rental damages when moving out has to do with the topic of this article..? Except warning not to dye your hair purple / lilac maybe, though still a bit far-fetched ;) And I know Expressen is a tabloid, and I'd never credit anything tabloids say, in any case. ;)

Ing-Marie Koppel
3/18/2019 09:24:52 pm

This post is very much needed. Thank you. I'm one of those women who would never dye my hair in such stark artificial colors. My hair is natural golden brown with red pigments and has in recent years been loosing its pigments, getting paler and more yellowish and silver white. Am not so fond of how it turns out to become. But guess I must up with it and accept it.

Reply
Christy
3/18/2019 10:16:06 pm

From a personal preference standpoint, I agree that Lady Gaga looks healthy and approachable with a more "natural" hair color, but I think that this discussion is more complex than that. Much like the "best lip color" discussion, some style IDs aren't complemented by a natural hair or lip color.

Don't get me wrong, color season is still critical in determining a person's best range of shades, but I wish this were as simple as "thou shalt not color thy hair."

Certainly, in determining a person's color season, natural hair color can make a big difference, but doesn't a person's style ID factor in here, too? I don't see Lady Gaga as a Natural style ID, so .I am not convinced that her natural hair color is essential to her best overall look. I see her as Dramatic, certainly. I think that matters.

For instance, a gamine could certainly pull off a bright hair color in her season, right? And wouldn't an Ingenue want to hold onto her youthful hair color for as long as she can pull it off? Now that I think about it Kristin Chenoweth (who I see as having a good bit of Ingenue) can pull off some blonde shades that probably only occur naturally in children, but she looks really good in them.

I can also think of a bunch of your more "formal" style IDs (Romantic, Dramatic, Classic) that aren't going to take grays lying down, either. I know I'm not. (EDC).

Even a Natural who is a Soft can look amazing with the right shades and distribution of highlights. Look at Jennifer Aniston.

I just think there is a more complicated discussion to be had here, and I sometimes feel like the hair color discussion (like the makeup discussion), can focus on "natural" without addressing those for whom "natural' is not a best look.

Reply
Melina
3/19/2019 04:40:43 am

Agree with basically everything you wrote here, Christy!

Just for an example, I have lots of R and I, and I know I'm not going to take grays lying down, when they'll start to happen, for sure ;) It just doesn't suit those ID's, in my opinion, either (which is a very unpopular opinion nowadays, I know).

Reply
Miranda
3/19/2019 04:41:26 pm

As an REG, I adore my silvers. I think they suit my style ID very well.

Reply
W.
3/21/2019 09:29:03 pm

I find the phrase "natural color" to be the confusing here. Does this mean the color that is currently growing out of my head? Or does this mean something that harmonizes with my seasonal palette?

I think those are often - almost always - the same thing, and do I would usually agree that a "natural color" is best. But I can think of cases where that isn't true. I have a spring friend who is going grey, and it's quite a cool grey too. She's dying her hair red, and it works well. I know a true summer whose deep, cool brown is turning brassy blonde as she gets older. She does it, because it classes with her skin tone. And when I was pregnant, my hair went from deep light summer blonde to a ruddy auburn that made my skin look red. In those cases, adjusting the color into the seasonal range makes sense.

I think of the way Christine Scaman of 12 Blueprints always has hair recommendations on her Pinterest boards -- she's always saying, "many soft summers have hair like this" or "completely believable hair for a dark autumn".

Again, I'm not completely clear on the statement in the original post. But my guess is that Rachel wasn't saying that one should never ever dye their hair, but that nature often knows best. What I'm not as clear about is if that means the whole seasonal range of colors, or only one's exact, right now, at the roots color.

(Also, Gaga does look pretty with the more natural hair color but I think her eyebrows are On Point in that white-hair picture. :) )

W.
3/21/2019 09:31:10 pm

...Oh wow. Autocorrect butchered that post. Ah well. You know what I mean. Or maybe you don't, but whatever
..

Melina
3/19/2019 04:32:16 am

Hmm, while I agree with most things stated on this site, I can't agree with "Your natural hair color flatters you more than any other color can". There are actually many, many people to whom another color than their natural one is more flattering! For example, many famous blondes or brunettes are actually known as redheads, even if it's not their natural color; it's their trademark, so to speak. And also, this article showcases only very artificial unnatural colors, like blue or green, not naturally occurring hair colors (that just don't happen to be the ones that grows from someone's head), which I feel distorts the matter in question. ;)

For myself, I've long known that red hair suits me very well, many people actually feel it suits me better than my natural hair color, though I now have my natural color (dark blonde / light brown) for years now. I've also known for long that I can't flatteringly go darker or lighter (more than one shade maybe), but redder, yes. Not quite sure what season that points to, but I think I have an idea. ;)

Reply
Victoria
3/19/2019 12:22:56 pm

I didn't really get the impression that she was saying one should never ever dye their hair. I thought she was specifically addressing the softer seasons' displeasure with their own natural hair colors? Perhaps pointing out that dying one's hair and having it come out within the correct color season is often difficult to achieve, and also (more to her direct point), that if you are a muted season, dying your hair something unnaturally bright isn't going to be a better look. I didn't think she was 100% talking about wearing the color you were born with, but rather the importance of picking a "natural" color rather than an "unnatural" color, especially for soft seasons. I can see the confusion with the word natural having different meanings in this case. That was just my interpretation...

Reply
Melina
3/19/2019 01:30:40 pm

You were probably replying to Christy's comment, as I didn't actually claim in my comment above that she had said "never dye your hair"? :)

But anyway, even if I didn't say so, that is the impression I actually did get, from this article ("Your natural hair color flatters you more than any other color can"), and others on this site, where she has several times said she's not a fan of dyed hair. Just browse through the site :) But of course, that may also be just *my* interpretation of her words ;)

Kels
3/19/2019 03:15:33 pm

Y’all are reliably passive aggressive in the comments. Lord.

Reply
Victoria
3/19/2019 04:11:04 pm

I was just replying at the bottom of the thread because that's where the reply button was.
Lol Kels.

Reply
Melina
3/20/2019 04:48:17 am

Victoria, I mean no offense whatsoever, so please don't take it that way, but just to explain the way the reply function works in here :) If you click the "reply" button under any message, your message will show as replying to that message; to reply just generally, if that's one's intention, it's better to use the "Leave a Reply" option at the bottom of the thread. :)

(Really don't like how rude & aggressive some of these commenters are getting... :/ I feel Rachel should remove some of them - I would, if I was her...)

Ninja
3/19/2019 08:12:49 pm

Kels, you must be bored, obviously...I write this comment to check if there is this passive agressive system that keep me clicking five series of pictures again. So I'm adding a comment here and the blog might be still active so that the online shop is still available- thats what this blog is, not for information and discussion. Old, boring posts over and over again...bleh

Reply
Kels
3/19/2019 10:30:50 pm

So you’re here to siphon off information that obviously adds to your life whilst having an attitude about it? I’m amazed at the lack of cognition. The sheer lack of self awareness. But hell, that crack rock’ll take you on a ride, I hear. More power to you.

Nancy
3/20/2019 03:50:17 am

Ninja, I agree with you. I guess the passive agressive system is there to keep you from commenting. Rachel is not interested in her readers. She is just innterested in money.

Ninja
3/20/2019 04:25:18 am

Yes Nancy, it' ugly true about Rachel and Rachel writes here comments-these obnoxious, aggresive, naive and angry attacks from a person who writes here as Kels here is probably Rachels. Kels-Rachel you are obnoxious person and your attack to me just confirmed your dullness. Stop talking nonsense, you've been constantly offending readers.
Exreaders, I guess. And stop projecting on me, nobody cares that you are amazed of your dullness.

Lena
3/20/2019 04:01:15 am

"Passive aggressive"? No idea what that (fairly rude) comment by Kels is referring to... She seems to be the one here who is aggressive (plus this commented calling herself Nancy, whose comments have always been rude), though not so much passive ;)

Reply
Holly
3/20/2019 05:21:54 am

Kels, highly sarcastic and aggresive reaction and tone of yours only shows how unrealistic and infantile you are. First think, then speak (write).Your blatantly words were narcissistic - what do you mean by accusing a reader of 'siphoning information'? Since when readers of blogs are 'siphoning information'? (WTF?) - and how anyone would 'siphon' any information from this blog when there is NO information? Rachel is only trying to siphon money. you are attacking a person who noticed this blog is empty for long time - learn to talk, not attack when you don't have an argument. Your words are only defending scam. You must be juvenile or you must be the blogger.

KC
3/19/2019 05:03:45 pm

Personally, I think Gaga looks gorgeous with a more "natural" hair color. That being said, it seems like she goes more for personal expression and shock value with her appearance, regardless of whether it makes her skin look healthy and whatnot.

I think Rachel's trying to be affirmative in this post and encourage women to see themselves as beautiful the way they are, even if their hair color isn't flashy or is hard to describe. And in terms of natural beauty, it's worth mentioning that dyes and coloring can be very hard on your hair--generally, hair is healthier, shinier, and stronger if you just wash and cut it and don't apply various chemicals to it. But of course, plenty of women (and guys too) are willing to put in the extra haircare work if it means they can express themselves more truly with a different hair color than they were born with. I believe there can be a middle ground between honoring your natural coloring and picking a hair color that you feel better represents your personality if you pick a color from within the parameters of your palette. If you're a light-haired Dark season who prefers to be a redhead, you're good as long as you stick with the deep, rich reds. If you're a blonde Soft Summer who wishes you were a brunette, you should probably find a cool-neutral, ashy brown (though I have seen a few warmer SSus who can go pull off highlights that come close to caramel). You'll pull off yellow blonde better if you're a Spring . . . You get the picture.

For any Soft Summers out there who *would* like to experiment with fun hair colors within their palette, this page has some good ideas (though I think a couple of them might skew more True Summer?):

https://www.elegancecolourconsulting.com/readers-question-soft-summer-hair-colour/

Reply
Melina
3/20/2019 04:41:29 am

KC, what you say about hair dyes being very hard on your hair is true regarding chemical permanent or semi-permanent colorants, but *not* herbal hair colors - they in fact make hair healthier, shinier, and stronger than it otherwise is! I know, I used them for years, and my hair hasn't been even near as strong & shiny ever since I grew out my natural color (even though I do like it)... Needless to say, I'm tempted to go back to henna & other herbals ;)

And non-damaging dyes also include direct dyes, also sometimes called vegetable dyes (no idea why, as there's no vegetables in them ;)), likes of Manic Panic, Directions, etc. They mostly come in unnatural colors only, though.

But I like those fun color ideas for SSu (though I'm not one), those are surely done with the above mentioned direct dyes :)

Reply
KC
3/26/2019 06:08:54 am

I forgot about henna!

Most people I know who color their hair use the chemical dyes, so that's what I'm familiar with. The herbal and direct dyes sound much nicer--if I ever get the urge to dye my hair, I'll go for those :).

Molly
3/19/2019 10:04:36 pm

My natural hair color is a soft honey/caramel color, and rather pretty, with curls with natural highlights. My skin, on the other hand, has a ruddy Celtic complexion, which was never meant for the Arizona Desert I grew up on. I look rather better when it's cool and rainy out, which for most of my life has been about two weeks a year.

The past few years I've been putting henna in my hair, and like the effect better; it looks less like I'm having a heat stroke whenever I get warm.

Reply
Melina
3/20/2019 04:27:08 am

I love henna & herbal colors too! Though one has to be careful not to apply full-strength henna, so as not to get day-glo / bozo orange :) I'm always tempted to go back to henna & herbal coloring, even though I love my natural color now, like I mentioned in my earlier comment... They are so good for hair.

Reply
Trisha
3/20/2019 05:08:43 am

I think the comments were originally directed towards Soft types of women who felt their hair colour to be a bit lacking in interest?! I have two friend, one soft and warm, the other soft and cool, who both look wonderful because they have not been tempted to go too blonde or extreme; in fact I've always admired that soft, blended glow they have about them. As someone who always had very dark (espresso) warm brown hair and pale skin, I was the exact opposite of them, quite high contrast, which I was equally happy with - it was me. However, and this touches the second point people are bringing up, not wanting to go grey, I have gradually lightened that colour over the decades as other components in my colouring have softened with age. My darkest olive green eyes are now grey/yellow mix and I am light golden brown/dark blonde depending on how much the sun bleaches out my colour! In fact, my very wavy, thick hair actually looks better with this colour, showing the texture more. I have gone from feeling distressed about grey hair and fading eyes to accepting and now loving these changes and whole new set of clothing colours. Of course I can no longer wear the darkest olive greens and burgundies they look hard on me, so I have moved to gentle camels and corals and replaced black near my face with a deep navy, which never worked before. I do take the point that you look best if every component goes together - as it does naturally in Nature. Not sure what season that makes me now, any ideas anyone?! I

Reply
Christy
3/20/2019 10:08:34 am

Bear with me, this will be a bit long. I just feel like my comments were misinterpreted, and clarification is warranted. And don't think it is lost on me that this discussion is, in part, about whether or not Lady Gaga was "Born this Way."

I think the purpose of Rachel's work in this area is primarily focused on helping people, particularly women, accept and enhance their own appearance. All of us were born with a certain structure and coloring that creates a visual impression. Identifying that impression can help each of us make choices to project whatever impression we choose to embrace.

I have Dark Autumn coloring. Rachel did a Style ID analysis on me that concluded that I am EDC (30-50-20 respectively). I have chosen to embrace that, and am trying to project that image through my clothing, makeup, and hair choices. It is a process, and I am certain that my views on this image and how best to use it for me will keep changing.

I am in my early 50s, so I have seen drastic changes in trends in fashion, cosmetics, media, and other areas that I can only call "image management." It is a big thing in people's lives, and seems to be even more exaggerated through social media.

At the moment there is a lot of push back against what some characterize as an objectification of women that many of these image-related industries feed on. There are a bunch of psychological and political components to these movements, and I don't want to suggest any moral judgment about people who choose to disengage from the commercial aspect of this image thing. I get it.

That said, I manage my image to please myself. Have I seen an advantage in my work and social spheres to wearing makeup and coloring my hair? Yes. Is that morally right or wrong? I can't say. I just know that for me, it works to use the image industry to my advantage. Rachel's work has helped me manage how the messages projected by the image industry influence my choices.

I have seen a lot of comments, here and elsewhere, that are very judgmental about those who do engage with the industry, which is why I said what I did about the Lady Gaga hair discussion. Is she beautiful in all of the pictures? Yes. Have I seen pictures of her where she looks more beautiful than any of the pictures above to my eye? Also yes. I wish I could post those links here.

I see Lady Gaga as having a lot of D and probably some E. To my eye, she looks her best in stiff narrow garments, often in lighter shades. She also looks comfortable and confident in a platinum blonde that is close to the off white shades that Soft seasons wear well. (I am guessing she is a Soft Autumn from the pix above.) Gaga does not look like she is playing dress up in these looks: they suit her. In my opinion they suit her far better than the picture with the Romantic cat eye or the Natural makeup.

Aside from the shades in the bright hair pix being too garish for a Soft Autumn, they are Gamine in personality, which Lady Gaga is not. In fact, there is nothing child like or playful about her appearance. I can see her looking amazing in a hair color darker than the "natural" pix above, but still in the Soft Autumn range, which would enhance her Dramatic side.

Has Gaga gone to her "natural" color to give her hair a break, especially from the platinum blonde damage? I would not blame her. Lightening your hair can completely fry it. But to those who are claiming that everyone's natural hair looks healthy and shiny, I would guess than they have not dealt with stubborn, dry, brittle, gray hairs like I have. May you be blessed with soft shiny grays, but mine are not. My hair is much more manageable when colored, even with just a clear glaze.

I have also found that the fashion advice about lightening your palette and your hair color with age has not worked for me. (Wearing my hair short does not work for me, either.) I really struggled with this, as I kept trying to make it work. It wasn't until Rachel confirmed my dominant Dramatic, and I went back to long dark brown hair (my original color) and wearing black clothes, that I really felt at home in my body again. Looking otherwordly and a bit scary works for me.

I can also see some methods for transitioning to gray, when I decide to do it, that will look less incongruous on me than the blonde highlight route so many people take (and has failed on me before). I need more contrast and drama, so I am thinking of big chunks of warmer toned grays or platinum. Not ready to do that, yet.

Rachel's post last week about ignoring the body shape advice on style sites is groundbreaking. I think it is equally important to examine how your style ID plays into your choices for makeup and hair (style and color), since these are big components to your image. Traditional advice in these areas is very limiting, and we can all contribute to helping Rachel push this envelope.Just keep in mind that the no makeup/no hair color decision may not suit everyone.

Reply
Janet
3/23/2019 01:36:31 am

Christy, I really appreciate what you wrote here and above. I love Rachel's advice in this post and others because it's a good reminder that you can trust your natural coloring to work for you. Just in general, I love coming back to this blog because it makes me appreciate how much variety there is in human beauty, both style and coloring.

But I've also wondered about the same things you said, that some style IDs support more colors than Mother Nature typically gives humans. A friend of mine has a lot of Gamine in her style ID. She has white hair that she wears in a boyish cut that looks great on her. The white hair suits her, but she sometimes dyes it with a bit of yellow, a bit of blue, a bit of green- and it looks great! The extra colors bring out the playfulness. I haven't asked Rachel to analyze my style ID, but as best I can figure out from the ID calculator, I'm EDI (maybe with a bit of C). When I look for makeup inspiration I sometimes Google the descriptive words for EDI, like dark fairy. I mostly get images of costume makeup, but on the right face, the blue or purple lipstick and hair, for example, look harmonious and not strange to me. I haven't tried it yet, but I'm tempted to get some temporary dye and see what purple or blue hair looks like on me!

I bet you'll look amazing when you finish transitioning to gray, however many years that is in the future. I can imagine that an EDC with long gray or white hair would be very striking!

Reply
Christy
3/24/2019 03:22:31 pm

Thanks for your comments, Janet. I am holding off on the whole gray thing right now. I would suspect that you can try out some purple or blue shades in your hair through wigs or clip on hair pieces. There is so much available that way, these days, and you can dye pieces like that yourself to get a more customized color to play with.

I admit that I personally prefer more human colors, particularly on myself, but I know I can comfortably go darker that what is growing out of my head right now.

As W pointed out above, the word "natural" has so many meanings in the fashion and beauty world. I know many people for whom the hair color growing out of their roots right now is not their best color. Again, it may be a perspective thing, but I know several people who have been through chemotherapy that had bizarre hair color changes. That new growth was rarely their best color, but it was growing out of their roots.

There are also the people who don't like themselves in makeup, or don't want to be bothered with makeup, who come to this website and type themselves with a Natural Style ID, when that may not be accurate viewed with an objective eye.

Again, I think there is a lot of nuance here, and all of this image stuff is a process.

Megan
3/20/2019 06:08:56 pm

As others have said, it seems really easy to go wrong when coloring your hair (too warm, dark, light, etc). But I like Christy's points about considering style ID, and I think there are instances when dyed hair might actually look more harmonious with one's ID.

Another note--I would love if there was a "What not to wear" type of show that helped women find, and shop for, their correct season and style ID. Or if Rachel created this show on Youtube! I think it would be super entertaining and informative : )

Reply
Christy
3/20/2019 08:08:01 pm

Megan, I am totally with you on the "What Not to Wear" type of show. It would really help to know how to shop and adjust my colors/style ID for my actual body. Of course, as an EDC, most of my best looks seem out of reach from a cost perspective, but achieving the look on a budget would be great.

Reply
Daiva link
4/8/2019 11:03:56 pm

wow, after i read this post, i dont want to color my hair anymore
😀, you wrote it soo beautifully!
Thank you!

Reply
Claudia Murray
8/8/2020 04:16:18 pm

If you want to see what to wear or not on YouTube there’s a lady on called Ally Art who does this for the 5 Kibbe Types. I’m working on this as well but check Ally first.

Reply
salonsuitespb link
3/29/2021 03:56:58 am

Dark blackish brown with unintentional streaks of white/gray starting to become more prominent. No one else notices them but me though. I love my natural hair color (without the gray).

Reply



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"My closet has totally transformed into something I like, but don't think about much. How amazing is that? I just walk in, grab something for the occasion and the weather, and go. Because it's all the same color season, it all blends. Because it's all the right style (my style, so who cares if it's 'in'? It looks good on me) I can rest assured it looks about right. It's really amazing.

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